What a great thread! I think it's really cool how you guys can open up like this. On the flip-side of the comments posted by 'no', I wanna add some positive comments, if I may.
As a woman, I don't see anything odd about someone having a long hair fetish, so there's nothing to be ashamed about, IMHO.
Sure, men look at women and always will, it's the way it is, fetish or not. ANY woman who thinks her husband or boyfriend isn't going to look at another woman, whether in person or online, is painfully fooling herself.
And sure, everyone wants to feel like they're 'it' for their partner, and maybe in the early stages of a relationship, they are... however, once the excitement dies down and reality sets in...
Now, just as men will look at women, women DO look at men too, no matter how much 'no' probably doesn't want to acknowledge that fact. But what's the harm in looking?
You all may have pics/vids on your hard drives that allow your fantasies to unfold in some way, and that's great; men are more visually stimulated than women. But keep in mind that what's good for the gander is also good for the goose. If you're having an intimate evening with your wife/girlfriend, would it bother you so much if she's thinking of someone else?
Should you even ask, 'what were you thinking about when...' Hell no! Don't ask (though *women* are actually notorious about asking the 'what are/were you thinking about' question). You don't need to know. I'd say 9 times outta 10, if you've been in the relationship for a long time, she wasn't thinking about you anyway.
Just enjoy each other. If what's going on in your heads makes the experience more pleasurable for both of you, then more power to it!
And if some of you fellows feel you can't share your love of long hair with your partner because it would hurt her in some way, then don't share it. What works for some doesn't work for all. There's nothing wrong with keeping things to yourself on the level that's under discussion here. If you're faithful in the physical sense to your partner, then that counts tremendously.
We ALL fantasize about something... doesn't have to be sexual. And we ALL keep some things to ourselves that we don't have to share with the world, or even those we care for the most. Some things are better left unsaid to avoid hurting someone you care about. As long as you're not out there cheating on your partner, or copping cheap feels of some unsuspecting woman's hair, then there's nothing wrong with looking. **Look but don't touch**
Loving someone doesn't mean you have to love or even like the same things as one another; we're all entitled to our own little idiosyncrasies (assuming they aren't harmful to anyone and/or illegal). To each his own, and kudos to those who can think independently & outside the box. Hey, just because Brad Pitt's abs turn me on, doesn't mean it's gotta turn anyone else on, right?
If you wanna go home after eyeing some long haired woman and jerk off til your wrist is numb, then by all means, go for it (I see masturbation as very normal, so there).
And for the guys who have partners who do happen to embrace and/or understand your 'fetish', well good for you! Treat her well because you're lucky!
All in all, despite what 'no' had to say here, I would find it abnormal to be with a guy who never looked at other women (or claimed not to). As long as he wasn't out there trying to shag everything that caught his eye, I don't see the harm in looking. But that's just my opinion. A woman's gotta feel secure and confident in herself first and foremost, and not depend on others (ahem, men) to give her validation, otherwise she's going to drive herself nuts in thinking her partner is always looking for something better.
Ok, end rant.
Anya